Criminal Offences

Parole Application Review: Fat State Police Parole Board: April 2012
We are pleased to say over the past 18months the accused has taken the custodial sentence seriously and has reformed in many ways.  The accused has ditched the diets and is continually developing good skills and has embraces positive thinking, good habits, and a balanced diet incorporated in a healthy food plan coupled with exercise. The accused has taken responsibility and is now accountable for her actions.
Due to the good behaviour of the accused we approve parole on her reaching the 50lbs weight loss expected April 2012.  The accused will of course continue to follow the healthy eating plan under the supervision of Her Majesty’s Weight Watchers Service till goal weight is achieved and will continue to maintain it.

PAROL APPROVED


 
FAT POLICE  RAP SHEET

Note*Suspect could not fit in frame. Avatar used
Criminal History Data  & Arrest Charges
ChargeId:#01254589
Alias: last known name-Georgette
Conviction Status: Criminal
Custodial Status: Received
County: Fat County
Custodial Agency: Her Majesty’s  Weight Watchers
Charge Desc. Charge class Disposition Sentence
Aiding & Abetting thunder thighs & bingo wings 1st Degree Felony Guilty Custodial
Conspiracy to binge Misdemeanour Guilty Fine
Disorderly conduct- scoffing & gorging 1st Degree Felony Guilty Fine
Excessive consumption of a controlled substance i.e sugar Felony Guilty Custodial
Driving under the influence of stretch marks and cravings Ordinance Guilty Warning
Failure to obey a healthy eating officer Violation Guilty Fine
Forgery & Fraud of fad diets & excuses 2st Degree Felony Guilty Custodial
Attempted kidnapping of choc and fried food family Ordinance Guilty Custodial
False swearing , denial & perjury in admitting daily food intake Infraction Guilty Warning
Malicious mischief: serial dieting Misdemeanour Guilty
Negligent of exercising  & drinking water 2st Degree Felony Guilty Custodial
Profiteering: unlawfully gaining excess pounds and tipping the scales 1st Degree Felony Guilty Custodial
Reckless endangerment of the gut Infraction Guilty Fine
Resisting arrest of food and exercise police Infraction Guilty Custodial
Robbery of cakes and frosted things Misdemeanour Guilty Custodial
Shoplifting of oversized clothes Misdemeanour Guilty Fine
Suspicion of carrying excess baggage Misdemeanour Guilty Fine
Tampering with a witness: AKA cup cake Ordinance Guilty Warning
Tampering with evidence of overeating Infraction Guilty
Grand theft FATO & Fat trafficking 1st Degree  Felony Guilty Custodial
Unlawful possession of a fat arm & thigh 1st Degree Felony Guilty Custodial
Violation of a no-contact order with bad habits Violation Guilty Custodial
Violation of a restraining face stuffing order Violation Guilty Custodial
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